Titanic

Recently a teacher, a garbage collector, and a lawyer wound up together at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter informed them that in order to get into Heaven, they would each have to answer one question.

St. Peter addressed the teacher and asked, "What was the name of the ship that crashed into the iceberg? They just made a movie about it."

The teacher answered quickly, "That would be the Titanic." St. Peter let him through the gate.

St. Peter turned to the garbage man and, figuring Heaven didn't *really* need all the odors that this guy would bring with him, decided to make the question a little harder: "How many people died on the ship?"

Fortunately for him, the trash man had just seen the movie. "1, 228," he answered.

"That's right! You may enter."

St. Peter turned to the lawyer. "Name them."

 

 

Thank you,
Anurag Bhatia

Just checkin on ya

Thanks

ujwal.kumarv

New and Old Jokes

 

Father 2 son.

padosi ki ladki ko dekh. woh exam main 1st aai hai.

Son: us ko he to dekhta tha tabhe to fail hogaya.

 

**

 

What is the different between chew gum and begum?

Both r sweet at the beginning and become shapeless tasteless n sticky at the end.

 

**

 

Q: What is the Extreme height of stupidity?

Answer: Two sardars Sitting in a Auto and fighting for corner seat!!!

 

***

 

Boy: I love u..

Girl: Me too

Boy: How much do u love me?

Girl: as much as u do.

Boy: U Cheater.

I thought u really loved me

 

*** 

 

A sardar was drawing money from ATM,

The sardar behind him in the line said,

"Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen ur password. Its 4 asterisks (****)."

The first sardar replies, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! U R wrong, its 1258"

 

***

 

Sardar: For the past one week a girl is disturbing Me.

I don't know how she got my no, she interrupts whenever

I call someone and say "please recharge your card"

 

*** 

 

Postman: I Have To Come 5 Miles to Deliver U This Packet

Sardar: why did U come so far...

Instead U could have posted it

 

***

 

In art gallery couple sees picture of a girl covered by leaf.

Husband was keep watching her.

Wife: ab chaloge bhi ya

Hawa k aane ka intezar kar rahe karte raho gaye?

 

***

 

Ants were taking bath and elephant jumped into pool.

Ants go out of water. One ant climbed on to the back

Of elephant, all ants cried “dubo dubo k mar sale ko".

Evolution of man:

Without shaadi spiderman

shaadi k din superman

shaadi k baad Gentleman

aur

B.V khobsurat hoto sari umar watchman

After a Quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you"

The husband replied, "Yes dear, but I was in loveand didn't notice".

 

***

 

a couple in train

Girl: my hand is in pain. Boy kisses her hand.

Girl: my neck is in hand. he kisses her neck.

And old man: bhai khairsh ka bhi ilaj karte ho kiya?

 

***

 

Teacher: write your father name in English.

Sikh student: beautiful red underwear.

Teacher: what is this?

Student: it's not wrong.

His name is sunder lal chadda.

 

***

Thanks

P.M.HEMAKANNAN.

SmileJokes of the Day For Feb 29, 2008

An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a
semester dealing with a broad array of topics.
The class was already seated and ready to go when the prof picked up his
chair, plopped it on his desk, and wrote on the board, "Using everything
we
have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist."

Fingers flew, erasers erased, blue books were filled in furious fashion.
Some
students wrote over 30 pages in one hour attempting to refute the
existence
of the chair. One member of the class however, was up and finished in
less
than a minute.

Weeks later when the grades were posted, the rest of the group wondered
how
he could have gotten an A when he had barely written anything at all.
What
did he write, they asked.

"What chair?"