(Life is getting much too serious, yes? Who doesn't need a daily smile? )
Getting a Library Card A quiet little man was brought before a judge. The judge looked down at the man and then at the charges and then down at the little man in amazement. “Can you tell me in your own words what happened?” he asked the man.
“I’m a mathematician dealing in the nature of proof,” said the little man.
“Yes, go on,” said the astounded judge.
“Well, I was at the library, I found the books I wanted and got in line to check them out. When I got to the front of the line, they told me my library card had expired and I had to get a new one. So I went to the registration office and got in another line to get the proper forms. I filled out the forms for another card and got back into a third line for my card.”
“And?” said the judge.
“When he asked, ‘Can you prove you’re from New York City?’ … I stabbed him.”
We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the "seniors' special" was Two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for $1.99. "Sounds good," my wife said. "But I don't want the eggs." "Then I'll have to charge you two dollars and forty-nine cents because You’re ordering a la carte," the waitress warned her. "You mean I'd have to pay for not taking the eggs?" my wife asked incredulously. "YES!!" stated the waitress. "I'll take the special then." my wife said. "How do you want your eggs?" the waitress asked. "Raw and in the shell," my wife replied. She took the two eggs home.